Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
PANTIES FOUND
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