Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
