This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
