Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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