saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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