To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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