So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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