can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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