i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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