I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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