omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Randomize
