I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
