12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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