Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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