It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
no, he came in my armpit
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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