i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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