She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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