She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
