even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
