Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
