mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
