Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Randomize
