Who did Billy Mays play for?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
How external is "for external use only"?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
