Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Vodka?
Forever.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
