Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
