Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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