They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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