im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
