I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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