i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
