Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
