i don't like sucking hair
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
