I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
