Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
