Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
