did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
