I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
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