Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
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