I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize