Pregnant stripper...not hot.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
foreskin is a definite game changer
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
