i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
