I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize