At least make sure they are 18
Why
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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