We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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