I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
