We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
