i don't like sucking hair
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
