i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
