You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Someone signed my nipple.
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