so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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